Tuesday, August 23, 2011

But Why?

What if you find yourself on the other side of the story? What if it was your baby who had to die so that another could live? What if you find yourself asking why?

Our whys could be losing a job, a spouse walking away, the tragic death of a child. Or your whys might be an ongoing struggle that will never change, no matter how desperately you pray.

My wife is a Special Education teacher. While her caseload doesn't consist of the most developmentally disabled, daily she faces parents who deep inside are asking "why". Six months ago one of her students shared the proud news of a baby brother being born. Unfortunately, this baby was born with just about everything wrong imaginable. He was hydrocephalus, blind, under weight, under developed, and under responsive. Collectively most babies in his condition would only survive weeks or at most a year. Naturally our heart went out to this family. Not only did they already have one special needs child, but they also lacked the means to fully take care of this baby. He requires frequent trips to LA for surgeries, check-ups, and other treatments. Without a car or any other means to make his appointments, my wife jumped in without hesitation.

This precious little baby was quickly accepted like part of the family. My daughter loves him so much she now wants a baby brother of her own.

At the same time we were struggling in prayer over my friend's baby mentioned in my last post, we were also struggling in prayer over this baby. Do we pray that he will be healed? Do we even have that much faith? Do we pray that he finds peace and that God calls him home with no suffering? Do we pray for the family, facing this challenging circumstance? In the end, we simply pray that God's will be done.

"As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, 'Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?'
'Neither this man nor his parents sinned,' said Jesus, 'but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.'" (John 9:1-3)

For all the reasons one could ask why: every tragedy, every adversity, every infirmary, every disability; maybe the answer is as simple as "so that the work of God might be displayed in your life."

Why is Tyler suffering through his short life while AJ is blessed with a new life? I don't have an answer, but I pray that God is glorified through both.


JC Dude said...

Your wife is a hero...just saying.
Bless you bro'

Fatha Frank said...

Thanks, Jay. I tried not to write this sounding boastful. But you're right, she's a keeper!

Megan Willome said...

I interviewed a family with a profoundly disabled child--unable to walk or talk at age 9. They considered her the biggest blessing, and she blesses her siblings' friends as well. We don't see as God sees.

Fatha Frank said...

Megan, thank you for coming by. I apologize for the late reply- I've been on vacation and have set the blog aside for a bit.

Your observation is spot on. Every parent of a special needs child considers them to be the biggest blessing...later in their lives. It's the first few years that are faced with doubt and frustration. But once persevered, they are able to look back and see victory in times that felt like defeat. It's hard to see like God sees when we're in the thick of it.

caryjo said...

You are so accurate. In the midst of crisis, whether children, jobs, health, weather, and on and on... we must keep our hearts focused on the Glory of our Father and TRUST Him. Sometimes not so easy, to be honest. Must grow and grow and grow in Him.